Exo Love-lines: The Way This KPOP Fangirl Sees It

This is for all you EXOtics out there (seriously tho SM, come up with a proper FC name already), since today is Thursday I think it is only fitting that today's post be about E.X.O.

(Yes, as you can tell I'm suffering from post-Exo Showtime syndrome... It just refuses to go away.) 

12 episodes was too short, SM, too short.

Today I'll be posting two - nay, three! Okay, just two - posts about Exo. In this one, I will be examining the delicate threads that are Exo's love lines. In the second one, well, stay tuned to find out.

Okay, so this is how I see Exo's love-lines:

Chanyeol is fucking in love with Kai.

Kai doesn't wish to interfere with BaekYeol love-line (besides he's got his D.O. waifu) though he does keep Channie as a mistress.

Baekhyun flirts with Kyungsoo to mess with KaiYeol.

D.O. is just O.O he has two guys wanting his affection (although one of them is only doing it to make his lover jealous) but he'll never leave his first love.

Kris wants Tao, then Lay, then Tao...but Tao has moved on to Sehun. Now no one wants Krissy - oh, except Suho omma, they are after all the omma and appa unit of WEAREONEEXOIMNIDA! 

Suho was left alone until he heard Krissy's sorry ass was dumped, saw the chance and enticed him with his deep, deep, deeeeep...wallet to be his nampyeon.

Tao is a playaaaaa~ He knows how to play bitchface Krissy to his advantage, then after getting all the Gucci's in the world - dumps him for the younger bitchface. (Tao may regret this later as the bitchface maknae is well-known to be extremely stingy - good luck trying to pry his wallet open, panda).

Tao must have learnt from the ultimate playa, Lulu! Whose recent lover is a steaming hot, adorable steamed bun. 

Baozi didn't realize Lulu had his eyes set on him (his buns? eheh) since before debut - hence the deer nicknaming him that. Only got serious with the deer after that playa dumped all his other bitches (though he occasionally sneaks in some loving with the exes from time to time).

The fantabulous Laynicorn used to have Lulu and Krissy, two bishes at the same time ya'll!! But complications arise (probably due to all three being cheating d-bags) and now XingXing is left nursing a broken heart that even his healing power can't properly stitch up.

Bitchface maknae felt a certain connection with dark maknae, especially since both are stingy frugal creatures. He did try to get it on with the chicken-lover but seeing that the dark maknae is too sexxay for his own good, Thehun Sehun left him and partnered up with the girly, ass-kicking Exo-M maknae.

ChenChen is forever alone. A lone orange / camel hybrid singing powerful ballads through his cheekbones. Then again, with cheekbones like that, who needs gheis when he can get all the gals!~

Or maybe he does want them gheis after all.

~ END RANT ~